To Pay, or NOT to Pay, That is the Question (but I’ll bet it’s not the question you think it is)...

WARNING: this is an X rated post, proceed at your discretion)

I have a dilemma: I am a 26 year old female. My boyfriend wants me to replace his mattress because I ejaculated on it. He says there is a gross smell that has developed since we started dating.
I am not sure that this "stench" is entirely or at all mine. He has a cat that has peed on items of furniture in the past and none of my other lovers have ever complained about a smell. I also warned my boyfriend that I was a female ejaculator and he seemed really excited about it when we started having sex. He could have used a towel but never chose to. In fact, he caused me to ejaculate every time we had sex. Should I pay for the replacement mattress? I might have been open to paying half, but the last time we talked about it, he was so mean that I don't feel any obligation at all now.
NOT a Wet Blanket...
Hey NOT:
I want to make it VERY clear that I - like most people in the Medical/Scientific communities who have studied this NON-phenomenon - DO NOT BELIEVE IN FEMALE EJACULATION! There is no biological/physiological mechanism for manufacturing or storing such ejaculatory fluid. For some women natural female vaginal lubricant pools inside the vagina in nooks and crannies and, with the muscular clenching of orgasm, can be squeezed out. This would be a relatively small amount of fluid, though visible. Some women, dependent upon the positioning of their urethra and bladder in relation to the vagina, can experience Stress Incontinence during sex or orgasm, which basically means, they're peeing. If you are turned on by pee, that's awesome, but it's not ejaculating. It's just not. No matter what you would like to believe. I think you peed on your boyfriend’s mattress. Please don’t write to me with all your anecdotal evidence. I’m waiting until some researcher discovers the heretofore hidden organ that produces this magical elixir, but which less than 1% of women seem to have. Until then, I’m a firm DISbeliever in female ejaculation.
That said, you told your boyfriend you were going to “squirt” on his mattress and he didn’t put down a towel. You don’t owe him a new mattress. What you DO owe your future lovers is the common decency of INSISTING on enough material between you and their mattress to soak up all the fluid, no matter what you believe that fluid is. Human body fluids stink and stain and are generally gross when they’ve soaked in and dried up. Anyone who expresses a significant amount of body fluid during sex whether it’s ejaculate, urine, blood, sweat, snot, whatever, should do this for their lovers. Mattresses are expensive and are intended to last a while. Further, if you sleep with a man who insists you NOT protect his mattress in response to the news that you will squirt all over it, frankly, you should think twice about exposing yourself to his mattress...

Annie Ory
Dating, Relationship & Grief Coach
http://www.mappinglove.com
Got a question for Annie? Write to me at annie@mappinglove.com